Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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