people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
i think my cat just said my name.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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