im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
