Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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