watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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