I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
