shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
