I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
