After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
