kristin has been a bad kristin
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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