i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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