just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize
