Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
