I CAN MOONWALK!
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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