Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
