sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize