Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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