i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
