guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
