have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
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