i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
