It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
We had sex on a dog bed..
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
