Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
