ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize