i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
