I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I can't turn off my feet"
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
