I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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