that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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