Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
My dad just said "fuck circus"
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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