doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
