Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
His nipple licking is glorious
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