Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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