Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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