i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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