Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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