i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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