Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize