I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
