I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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