I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize