im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
