You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
