You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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