So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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