I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize