Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
