Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
