i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
