i don't like sucking hair
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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