Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
