The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
